An Open Love Letter/Desperate Plea to My Neck--

You know, maybe I'm wrong, but I thought we had a really good thing going.

You do a lot of hard work in this relationship. I know that you're involved in a lot of my everyday movement. That's gotta be rough. I mean, I just used you to take a sip of my iced tea right now. But I don't think it's been an entirely one-sided relationship. Haven't I always stretched you? Before working out, dancing, even some mornings when I sensed you didn't appreciate how I slept, I've always tried to be careful of you. I let nice people like Swetus and others rub you on occasion. It's because I appreciate your hard work. Remember that massage that Sharon bought us? Wasn't that nice? Didn't it make us both feel good, what with the nice smells and the great music and lovely company? Those were good times. Why can't we have more times like that? I know you've got a lot of burden to bear, and I've never wanted to be one to add to your troubles or make your life more difficult. I thought we had a nice little give-and-take.

But clearly there was a breakdown in communication. I'm willing to take the blame for that. Maybe I neglected you one too many mornings or didn't pay attention to some of your more subtle hints. So I understand that you did what you had to do, and hurting me forced me to pay attention to you. I can't blame you for that, I'm a girl who needs a lot of attention, too.

But didn't I take immediate action to tend to your needs? Didn't the nice doctor I took you to go see put nice heating and cooling things on you? Didn't he add that nice electrical pulse that loosened you up a bit? Didn't that make us BOTH feel better? I fully understand that this problem won't be fixed overnight. Relationships need constant work and that takes time. I appreciate this fact. But I really thought we were getting somewhere.

And then you let a little accident stand between us and a brighter future. Maybe it's not right to blame you for it, but accidents happen and I don't know why you're reacting so strongly about it. Hand didn't mean to slip when I was propping myself up. The comforter doesn't allow for good grip--and don't blame the comforter, because you know you love that thing as much as I do. So Hand slipped a bit. And Shoulder had to compensate so Brain wouldn't splatter everywhere. Because none of us win when that happens. And I know you and Shoulder are close and stuff that happens to Shoulder really affects you, but when are we going to stop playing games with each other?

I am aware I need to tend to you. So I'm okay with one night being uncomfortable and not very restful because you weren't getting your needs met. But one little accident after all I did yesterday? I didn't even jump up and down at my best friend's show last night (which really rocked) because I was trying to keep YOU in mind. I didn't fully hug my friends. I didn't want to upset you. And how to you repay me? Waking me up every time I tried to move in my sleep just so I'd constantly be aware that you're pissed. Well, you know what? I think that crosses a line. You're like an infant, Neck. Do you want me to treat you like that? Because what you are doing is what babies do, and depriving me of sleep when I am doing everything I can to attend to you is unfair and it makes me grumpy and exhausted and then I'M not happy too. I thought you could be more mature than to try to bring me down with you.

All I'm asking for is a little bit of restful sleep. That's not too much, I don't think. And most of my waking time is now dedicated to you, I'm waking up very early to go see the nice doctor who gives you treatments and I'm trying to be even more cognizant of your needs. I just need you to give back a little. Attack me all you want during the day--I'm a big girl, I can take it, but the sleep deprivation is only going to make things worse between us. It makes me wonder why I even bother with you at all.

I hope we can get back to the way things were. If we do, I think we both deserve a little treat like the one Sharon got us. Doesn't that sound nice? But you have to be willing to meet me halfway, otherwise this relationship will never work between us.

Respectfully,
Me